I woke up early (6:15) and posted photos to last nights blog. Then went upstairs and gather up gifts for the boys and one for Sarah. When I was gathering the gifts several of the other boys were in my room watching me ad wanted something. I ended up giving 4 or 5 beach balls to them. They all said "Thank you" in english.
Just a word of advice. If any of you ever come to camp with me don't get too close in the morning. My last shower for the day has been at the pool around 4:00 pm. Then when I get back I get clean clothes and use them for the next day (including sleep just in case someone needs to come into the office in the middle of the night).
So, I went out the building and waited for Andrew. He came out about 5 minutes later. Billy came up to me and said "Good morning Bill", "Good morning Billy, how are you", "I'm fine, thank you very much" and then a big hug. Bob was walking with Andrew and then came over to me and grabbed my hand to help him walk to breakfast. Billy was very calm this morning. He new he was going to leave. Normally he rides on my back to breakfast but not this morning. On the way to breakfast he saw that I was carrying gifts. He told Andrew "All gifts are from God". WOW, this boy is just amazing. At breakfast he was sitting by himself until Sarah came in. He didn't really want me to sit with him which was fine. After Sarah came in though they called me over and wanted to get photos. If the camera makes it back from the trip you will see those later today. They wanted them of my group and Kates. Breakfast went fast and we were motioned to get ready to leave. We walked to the bus area and took a couple more photos. I gave Billy his gift there. He pulled it out of the bag and then QUICKER than you ca see put it in his backpack (protective instinct). I wanted to get a photo but that wasn't going to happen. Oh well. The bus showed up on time and was loaded rather quickly. We said our goodbyes.. wait for it... wait... Okay he is in the seat and looking out the window TEARS RUNNING down his face. OH MY GOSH! I COMPLETELY LOST IT!!! I ran up to the window and put my hand against his. He just looked at me with tears in his eyes. It just wouldn't stop... I think I grabbed whoever was next to me and just gave them a HUGE squeeze. TEARS everywhere. Sarah came over and gave me a hug with TEARS in her eyes. I will see her again soon. I think she just feels so many emotions for these children and especially Billy. I gave her my camera. I showed her ow to use it at breakfast but I am sure if she has a problem Billy will help. He figured the thing out in a couple of minutes.
David got on the bus and went and gave the kids hugs, Billy is also his favorite. He attached to both of us this week VERY STRONGLY. Then I saw them talking through the window. David came - Another BIG HUG and then he said to me, "Billy told me that Jesus Loves you" meaning me. WOW, just incredible. He looked out the window and me and David with our arms around each other and smiled and took our picture. I gave him the sign for Love and pointed to him - He did it back. I cried some more... and more... and more... This was terrible. There were still two kids missing and the bus was loaded and waiting for them. This was just torture for them. Other people were trying to put their hand up on the window with him and he would wave them off. Selfishly I LOVED seeing that. He only wanted me and David to do it. Andrew came back over to me and gave me a bunch of hugs. I think Mike got some good photos so I will see if I can get them. The bus finally pulled out the gate as we all followed and waved. This was so the opposite feeling of the kids leaving for church camp. To know that this may be the last time I will ever see this boy. Did I do enough, say enough, show enough... All I could do is let him know that God loves him and so do I. I had to go and take a minute by myself.....
I came back and found Chris. Tears were still in his eyes. I gave him a HUGE hug. If you haven't noticed there is a pattern here at camp - can you see it yet? That leads me to the office where I am typing this now. I could go to sleep or maybe explore like some of the others but I don't feel like I am done yet. I think I am going to go off and find the rest of the kids that are still here and try and have some fun with them. Hopefully that wont make things worst for me but if it does and also makes the kids happy then it is 110% worth it. I love these kids so much and I want to see some of the other off that I have been talking about and be there for Kate, Alan and Byron and some of the other volunteers. Again, selfishly, I was glad that our group left first so that I didn't have to think about this all day.
Off to find my silly hat and go play with the kids....
Love you all. Thank you for the prayers. Pray hard for Billy and Bob.
PS - I know some of you are probably thinking "What about Bob?" He actually wanted to go back. He was not sad at all. He did have a smile on his face when he saw me but he just doesn't have the capacity to understand. He is a SPECIAL boy created by God. He will be a prince one day in Heaven. I truly believe this.
XOXOXO
2 comments:
I read this post right before I left for work and all morning I thought about how you felt on saying goodbye and wondering if you did enough. I kept coming back to an old Steve Green song, Thank you for giving to the Lord. In it the person in the song meets the people in Heaven that he had an impact on through the time, money and talents he gave in serving the Lord. I can picture "Billy" or "Bob" coming up to you and you seeing that face you left looking out that bus window and they come up to you and thank you for giving to the Lord. Or maybe it will be a complete stranger who comes up to you and says you don't know me but you impacted the life of "Andrew" who in turn impacted my life. Thank you for giving to the Lord.
Thank you Martin for making me cry again. Seriously though, thank you!!!!
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